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Part 2

Maan and Sanjana were friends from childhood. They grew up together and were inseparable. When their parents decided to get them married, no one could have been happier than them. However, fate had other plans. Sanjana got with a major accident and had to remove her uterus due to the deep injury she suffered. Doctors proclaimed that she could never become a mother. Sanjana kept herself away from others feeling that she didn’t deserve it. Maan never allowed her to go into depression. He told the family that they would get married and adopt a child. However, his family was not willing to adopt someone’s child. Man told them to get a surrogate mother, but they were against that too. Maan’s mother knew Geet’s chachi who was one among her kitty party friends. She suggested that they could get him married to Geet for the child. She told that Geet was a burden to the family and she wanted to get rid of her. She told that no one should know about the reason behind marriage and they can blame Geet for the divorce when it happens. Maan’s mother was happy with this option but kept away the other facts mentioned by Geet’s chachi from others. She told them that they could get Geet married to Maan and divorce her after she delivered the baby, but they should keep the fact hidden from others. Maan and Sanjana were against this but eventually Maan had to agree considering the happiness of Sanjana, when his mother told that she would then have to re-think about Sanjana being part of their lives.

Maan was restless throughout the rituals and he just wanted everything to be finished off at the earliest. When he saw her waiting for him in his bed on their wedding night, he felt like he has made a mistake. It was Sanjana’s dream to have a great wedding, their wedding, but here he is married to someone else. He asked her to change not wanting to be rude. Nevertheless, not once he thought of the girl whose dreams were crushed even before she could feel it. When she came out changing, he could see how beautiful she was. He moved towards her deciding himself to put an end to all these. He reluctantly hugged her and her soft skin on her neck was visible for him to place kisses on it. He took her to the bed but couldn’t look into her face as he felt that he is cheating Sanjana. He switched off the lights and proceeded to do what he intended to. Even though reluctant at first, her submission put him on ease as he experienced the bliss of the moment. He could feel her hand comforting him on his back when he panted hugging her. He loved the feeling; a sense of belongingness was there in her touch. Nevertheless, he was doing something that he never wished, he hated. He rolled to his side and slept. Morning when he woke up, he saw her cuddled up with the comforter towards the other end of the bed like trying not to disturb his sleep. He felt a pang of guilt seeing her. He stood up and went to take bath.

When he came out, he saw that she was dressed back to her night suit and it somehow brought the feeling of her soft skin and her soft moans last night. He was angry with himself and asked her to take bath not wanting to be in the same room as her longer. She came out dressed in a red saree, which enhanced her complexion. She was beautiful. His thoughts were broken again when he heard Sanjana calling for them. Her voice again made him drown in the pain and guilt and immediately went to open the door. When Sanjana came and looked at the bed, he regretted for opening the door without thinking. He knew how much it might have pained her. She saw her hiding the pain in her smile. He was surprised hearing Geet calling her di. However, before he could tell something, both of them left. When he came down, he saw Geet signing the papers given by his mother not even bothering to look what it is. He was angry with his family for making him do this. Sanjana had calmed him down even though she was in the same boat as his. She never wanted to do it. She was already feeling bad for Geet and the morning incident had caused her an unwanted pain.

As days passed by he got more comfortable with her and he actually started liking their togetherness. He was feeling good whenever he was with her, as if he was in peace. He would wait for the whole day to end so that she will be in his arms. The passion they shared was something he could never ignore. When the doctor announced that she is pregnant, he was very happy. When Sanjana came and hugged him, the reality came crashing down to him. He knew that the pretense has to end soon. He hugged her back, angry at the fact that he got carried away by his relation with Geet. However, both were unaware of the pain in the eyes of the person who watched them silently. He kept himself away from Geet after that and the thought of his child gave him immense happiness to notice anything. He noticed that everyone in the house started to get comfortable with Geet other than Annie and mom. Even though he checked for her health concerns and went with her for check-ups, he started ignored her presence and any confrontations. It was more of the anger of being carried away. However, when he got his baby in his arms for the first time, he was overjoyed. He saw Geet giving the baby to Sanjana and noticed the smile in Sanjana’s face. He was happy about the decision that brought the smile back to Sanjana’s face. He went near her and held her closer seeing her teary eyes. However, he failed to notice the unshed tears and pain in the eyes of someone who watched their happiness. The days followed were filled with happiness to both him and Sanjana. Their son was getting more attached with Sanjana, not once did he feel that she is not his mother. For him it has always been the same.

One day when he went down in the morning, he saw his mother was checking some legal papers. He wondered what are those when he heard Sanjana trying to persuade her. He could see that Sanjana was not happy. When he was about to talk to them, he saw both of them had stopped talking and was looking at the stairs shocked. He turned to see Geet in a white salwar suit, which he never saw her wear, holding their son and a small bag on the other hand. She walked towards him and he noticed that she hasn’t wore sindoor or mangalsutra as she used to do every single day. He feared something and his fears were confirmed when she forwarded her hand which had her mangalsutra. When she told that it doesn’t belong to her anymore, he was confused whether she came to know about his relation with Sanjana. However, her words followed shook him; she all the while knew why he was doing all these. When she corrected as his son, he felt someone stabbed his heart. She knew that she has to leave one day. She placed the mangalsutra in his hand and moved to Sanjana before he could tell something. He noticed that her eyes were blank, with no emotions. Her words to Sanjana proved him that she knew everything, not just the reason for their marriage. He closed his eyes in despair when she moved to go after giving their son to Sanjana and bidding bye to Nakul. Her words followed were like arrows piercing his already bruised heart. How can someone be so selfless? He knew that she loved their son beyond words. However, she gave everything she had to him and left him for his happiness. He dropped himself on the couch when she moved out of the house.

Vasundhara came and touched his shoulder. He shouted, “Are you happy now? I have destroyed her life. How could you make me do this mamma? Haven’t you once thought what if Annie was in her place? Why am I blaming you? It is all my fault. I should have never agreed to this marriage at the first place. How could I stoop so low? Chi.. I can never forgive myself and will never forgive you for making me do this. I hate myself.” He stormed off to his room with Sanjana following him with the kid. Aryan and Dev were in almost the same state. They glared at Vasundhara and left to their respective rooms. The realization was sinking in their hearts on what they have done to an eighteen-year-old innocent girl. When Maan was out of his self-hatred, both him and Sanjana tried finding her, but couldn’t locate her anywhere. He came back to his room, which was once their room. It still carried her fragrance. He noticed that she hasn’t taken anything except what she had brought with her. He noticed the frame in the table missing his and their son’s picture. How could someone be so selfless when all they did was just using her. She loved him, not expecting anything. She left her life, her child with him. Maan couldn’t control from hating himself.

He remembered how she never questioned him when he was aloof of her. She always submitted herself to him without any complaints. He could feel her longing for him during the times of pregnancy but he was too angry at himself to care for it. The reaction of her family, when he went in search of her there, was another blow to him. They appeared calm or to some extent happy about her departure. He could learn from one of the maids in their house on how she lost her parents at an early age of five and how she was treated by her chacha, chachi and cousin brother. Everything was too much for him to bear, the fact that he was not better than them made him punish himself daily. Seeing their son was the only happiness he had. Sanjana was equally guilty for supporting all these. After about a month, they got to know that she was staying in a ladies hostel. However, luck was not with them as they were told that she left two days back. The nuns were not ready to disclose any further information and they returned dejected. He told hugging Sanjana, “What will I do Sanjana? I feel like God also wants me to die in regret throughout the life.” Sanjana reciprocated his thoughts and told, “Maan, mein bhi apne aap ko kabhi maaf nahi kar pavoongi. Dua kare woh jaha bhi ho khush ho.”

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